Wednesday, September 21, 2016

Counting My Blessings

It's hard to believe I haven't written a post here since January. So much life has happened since, so I'm not quite sure where to begin. I'll do my best.

One year ago, I suffered a breakup with someone whom I loved very much. I wanted very much to believe that we were meant to be together, but ultimately she did not. The happy ending to this story is that we've both worked very hard to find something new: a deep and abiding friendship.

I've experienced pain on a physical level that most people could never comprehend. I came to see pain as merely an illusion. I could observe it, analyze it, and disconnect from it while still fully feeling every sensation. And I came to understand how unbelievable strong my own body truly was. But pain of heartbreak is another thing altogether. As it was possible for me to "check out" of my body during intense physical pain, there was simply no escape from the steel cage of my own mind. As the connection that I had to romantic love began to fade, I started to feel very alone, rejected, and scared. So I began to do a few things about it. And instead of my usual long-winded rant, I'll simply try to tell this story with pictures:

1. I played a lot of music with my friends:


2. I began to run, keep running, started lifting, lost 30 pounds, and got in the best shape of my life:

3. I wrote a bunch of new music that I'm really, really proud of: 

4. I sought Zen through gardening, and found that I have a green thumb:

5. I accepted an offer for my dream job and started helping the community even more. I now run the Community Outreach arm of KVUE-TV, and manage the most powerful platform in Austin with which to do good throughout Central Texas.

 6. I invested my summer into healing my body with Thai Massage, meditation, and the help of a very good friend:

7. I got a dog:

8. I swam:

9. I prayed:

10. I got a new guitar:

11. I met a new friend that has challenged my mind, softened my heart, and inspired me to be the best man I can be. Tomorrow, we are getting on a plane together to vacation in Seattle.

When I look back over the past year, I could think of all the things that I lost. And yet, even within the exercise of writing this post, I realize how much I've gained, and how truly grateful I am for every step of my journey. Gratitude.

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